Full... finally.

So basically: for like... 3 weeks, I haven't been eating or sleeping well. The past several days have been better: more like 1000-1500 calories a day, and 4-6 hours of sleep a night. But previously it was like, 500-1250 cals a day and 0-4 (if I was lucky) hours of sleep. It sucked.

And it was really straining me too. I couldn't concentrate in class, felt like I was going to pass out a lot. I was weak, drained, tired, and really overloaded emotionally, because of crap with Jon partially, but mainly all the shit in my head (see cfm). I felt like shit, just completely.

But last weekend I slept, like at least 1/2 of it away. And I've been eating more.

I checked the scale today though: 110. I was sorta happy to see it, an sort of scared. Cuz I must have been under that at one point. And I like being 110. It's a nice number. If I could just stay here, I'd be okay. Jon says he likes how I look... well, lately he has been talking about how worried he is, and he mentioned a little over a week ago that I was getting "skinnier," which implies that I was already skinny, which I don't believe. Slim, trim, fit, yeah. Skinny: not so much. And he wants a girl with "meat on her bones." I like meat: to eat. Not to have on me. But whatever. I''m not trying to starve myself. Not on purpose.

In any case: that's all for now. I'm going to take a nap, then study my ass off for my test tomorrow in Islam. It's a map test... I'm fucked.

Jalapenos, Gelapagos Islands, and Jahariyah.

the crazy bitch on the edge.