last day

well, today was the last day of school- and it sucked. i saw david twice, and each time was less than 5 minutes. i didn't get a chance to give him the binder, and the last time i saw him i didn't know it would be the last time. so unless by some miracle he calls or stops by, i won't be able to actually talk to him for months. i am so depressed. i ended up crying on the bus and when i got home. *sighs* oh well. i don't know. we'll just have to see what happens with that.
at the volleyball game i joked around with sarah d and daniel and tiffany, which was fun. at least, it took my mind off of depressing stuff for a little while.
rrr... jeremy made me sorta mad during third period. we were helping move crap and he asked what was going on with david, so i told him we were going to try for a long distance relationship and he said i was an idiot. maybe i am, but i don't need him to tell me that. if i am, i will have to see on my own. but that all depends on david, and i am trusting him, so... but that is not what i was talking about. he started hitting on me and a lot of other stupid crap... i won't get into detail. nothing actually happened... but... yeah.
i have a feeling that next year i am going to end up being a bit of a loner at school- i dont know, i just am not really that sociable anymore. i'm more reflective now. a lot has happened this year. it seems like just last week that school started, but it seems like years ago since this morning. i have really changed and matured and developed a different outlook (and insight) on things. in a good way too. already i look back on the beginning of the year and think what was i doing??? my perspective is so much more realistic now- i really think i'm starting to find out who i really am. it's about time.